The Post About Swimsuits

I have the biggest unofficial war waged on swimsuits. They are evil, pure evil!

No, I am not being irrational I have perfectly good explanations for this vicious battle.

One: no swimsuit ever fits properly after you wear it. I swear they have a secret mechanism that makes them stretch in the exact shape your body is not! After about the third time wearing it, it is no longer a swimsuit, just a misshapen heap of fabric on the floor of your closet doomed to spend the entirety of winter laying hopeless only to face the trash come next spring.

Two: all swimsuits sold today that aren't for toddlers and seventy year old women are bikinis, and what is a bikini good for? Swimming? Covering your skin? certainly not either of those because that would be outrageous. 

Also, just a side note of bikinis, more often than not you have to buy a top and a bottom separately. No target I will not spend 20 dollars on a top and then be forced to spend another 20 on a pair of bottoms, because that is forty dollars and I can buy two t-shirts that completely cover my body and can be worn during all seasons for forty dollars.

Three: Wearing a wet swimsuit is one of the worst feelings ever! I live in Michigan and the sun doesn't try out a swimsuit completely for a good three hours.... 3 HOURS! I don't want to sit for three hours, I would rather just change out of it, except then when I want to go swimming again I have to put on a wet swimsuit (which is just as horrible a feeling really)

That was my rant on swimsuits and my reasons for waging this intense war! I hope that you weren't too annoyed with all of the grammar mistakes and complete lack of sentence structure, overwhelming rage due to swimwear can do that do you grammar.